**Chris Fallen** (@ctfallen) is a research associate professor of space physics at the University of Alaska Fairbanks (UAF) Geophysical Institute. He is also the chief scientist at the UAF High-frequency Active Auroral Research Program (HAARP) ionospheric research observatory, a former UAF faculty senate president, and the current chair of the University of Alaska Faculty Alliance. For the record, his giant cat has never sat on the HAARP ionospheric heater, but probably would if given the opportunity.