This talk will present a novel design for an onion-routed anonymity network, designed for deployment across mesh-routed low-cost microcontrollers, regular PCs, and Android phones. This new network is more similar to FidoNet or UseNet than Tor, and can be easily embedded into a cross-compilable application. The Tor anonymity network has problems being deployed on embedded devices and high-latency network connections. Tor's reliance on the bidirectional socket model also leaves it open to timing correlation attacks. RatNet solves those issues by making a drastically different set of design assumptions. We need some peer review! If you're the sort that loves picking apart other people's attempts to use crypto, this is the talk for you!