The mjg59 Smile Time Variety Half Hour

Presented at Kiwicon X: The Truth is In Here (2016), Nov. 17, 2016, 10 a.m. (30 minutes)

People want stunt hacks of dog feeders and space shuttles. People need meaningful improvements in security. You can't always get what you want[1], even if you might get what you need[2]. But fuck that. This is Kiwicon. I'm going to give you what you want *and* what you need. In 30 minutes you'll learn about a brand new defensive technology that'll mitigate a bunch of privilege escalation attacks and container escapes, something that'll let you verify that an Onion endpoint didn't boot an NSA software stack and a 2FA solution for checking nobody's replaced your system firmware with a thinly veiled pretext. BUT WAIT. THERE'S MORE. You'll also hear about terrible IoT devices, why nobody should be allowed to do their own encryption, how basically everybody screws up transfer of devices to new accounts and probably some more bullshit after I dig my way through the pile of boxes of dubiously sourced equipment sitting in my living room. ALL THIS FOR ONLY 30 MINUTES OF YOUR TIME ACT NOW OFFER VOID IN NORTHERN TERRITORIES AND ADAMS ISLAND [1] Rolling Stones, 1969 [2] Rolling Stones, 1969


  • Matthew Garrett / mjg59 as Matthew "mjg59" Garrett
    Matthew Garrett is a qualified fruitfly geneticist and an unqualified software developer[1] who has spent too much time reverse engineering dreadful things and dearly wants to give something back to the world so he's not just remembered for that one time where he said some things about a smart plug and was suddenly big on Weibo [1] although he has an RSA Stage 1 CLAIT in word processing, spreadsheets and databases (Distinction)


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